Abi Lancelotte

815 days ago

Photo Article from the Welsh Hovel - starting work on creating a blackberry and blackthorn hedge

No doubt yesterday’s small fire will get blasted on the village facebook site since it was in direct view of teenage mutant curtain twitcher Abi Lancelotte. For I am hard at work removing a thick wall of bramble that runs either side of a drainage ditch seperatng oiur top field with the main field. Cutting this tangled mess back with a strimmer is is bloody hard work and I fear that it will take me two or three weeks to get it all sorted. 

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903 days ago

Photo article: And so a woman stops her car in the village to scream at me...

No this was not the teenage mutant snitcher queen Abi Lancelotte or one of the Holt village mask jihadists for I was wandering back from the school drop off which, though in the open air, sees most parents mask up as they enter the playground. Natch, I do not.

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1048 days ago

Photo Article from the Welsh Hovel - opening up the fields - a new run in with teenage mutant curtain twitcher Abi?

It was this time last year that I had my first run in with infamous Abi Lancelotte and her mum. My “crime” then was getting a path around our fields moved by a tractor and telling folks they could walk along it, enjoying the river and fresh air in lockdown. What a bastard thing to do! Abi, her mum and a few others went ballistic and some folks were soon moaning about the good old days before incomers (i.e. English infidels) started moving in.

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1080 days ago

Photo Article from the Welsh Hovel: The amazing view we have created for teenage mutant curtain twitcher Abi Lancelotte

On one side of the farmyard at the Welsh Hovel lies a scrap metal skip, full to the top with more than three tonnes of iron. On the other side is the pile of sandstone blocks pictured below, many already hewn into shape. All were retrieved from the nettle and bramble covered large earth mounds that once separated our fields from the paddock where we have created the mound which will end with a Ha Ha. Suffice to say, we also removed vast amounts of plastic, tyres, asbestos and other horrors for safe and legal removal.

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1085 days ago

Photo Article from the Welsh Hovel - another bonfire for mutant teenage curtain twitcher Abi as more buried horrors emerge

As you can see below, there is another chance for teenage mutant curtain twitcher Abi Lancellotte to get into a frightful tizzy as we burn off more brushwood from the top of man-made scrap mounds here at the Welsh Hovel. What you can also see is just how much awful junk we have removed from those man-made mounds at the edge of the field which we are now clearing. The earth goes onto the flood defence which will end with a Ha ha and another skip has arrived to remove another three tonnes of scrap metal which we have found buried here, including old farm machinery, stacks of barbed wire and other horrors. We have also taken out hundreds of sandstone blocks which will now be going into the Ha Ha wall making it a thing of real beauty. “FECKING Incomers….


Digging up things of beauty we’d buried and showing them off, removing legally and safely and at great cost tonnes of scrap iron, glass, asbestos and plastic we had buried and those vats of bitumen and tyres we had discarded. Fecking incomers. They just do not understand what it is to be Welsh. Feckers.”  


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1093 days ago

Photo Article from the Welsh Hovel - look snitches this is what we are actually doing!

Thanks to one of the daft in-bred snitches here in Holt, the last village in Wales, folks like teenmage mutant curtain twitcher Abi Lancelotte, at some stage some pen pushing jobsworth from Natural Resource Wales will be visiting us here at the Welsh Hovel. Pictured below is the work underway and what he or she will find. I make no apologies if the pen pusher is one of the other 108 genders and is offended by being referred to only as he or she.

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1097 days ago

Abi the teenage curtain twitcher with a new snitch on those folks at the Welsh Hovel

I was only joking when I suggested that someone here in the last village in Wales, snitch-on-Dee would report me for having a bonfire. But hey ho..meet Abi Lancelotte, the teenage curtain twitcher.

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